Blog entry for:

my understanding of the truth changes each day as i grow. so what a full morning, here it is 1030, and i am just getting down to composing this. as i walk through today, i am finally getting used to the changes that i have consciously been making in my routine. some are voluntary, others, well, mandatory is such a harsh term, but i have very little choice over them, such as my morning commute. yes, big companies move very slowly and my patience with that fact, although better than before, has yet to grow to a point where i can accept that fact. tolerate, well even that is tough on some days, but that is becoming part of what i can do, at least today.
the reading was not about patience, tolerance or even acceptance today, but for me, all of those fit into my understanding of my truth for today.
here is where i fall back on a very old and tired cliché: the longer i stay clean, the less i know.
what is the TRUTH today? well i broke my anonymity during a job interview this morning. it is the second time in the past 2 months where that has come up and all i had to do is answer a simple question, why did i get my engineering degree in my forties. after all, most normal people have a career and their education done long before they reach that age, and if they return to school it is to further their career and not necessarily get started on the first. when i was asked, i started to fabricate a story that left out some very pertinent and germane details. more than likely, at this point in this hiring cycle i could have not only got away with it, but it would not have been noticed. i paused and launched into a brief overview of my professional life during active addiction and arrived at how at two and half years clean, i felt i needed something more. of course, more money was one thing, but my decision to return to school was more about me getting more as a person. fulfillment of my dreams and a place from which i could grow.
anyhow, my magic key has arrived, so i need to sign-off and see if i can get it to work. it is after all, what i have been waiting for.

∞ DT ∞