Blog entry for:

once out of bed, i am almost always glad i did.
well for me, this is almost as cheesy as dolphins frolicking st sunset in the surf. the metaphor, more than a bit stretched, is better than that of an automobile, but not by much. i will however, work with what i got.
as many of you do not realize, i am a so-called ,morning person, up early, no matter what time i went to bed last night. i do my best work in the morning and i am the smartest, most alert and most capable of critical thinking after the first cuppa coffee in the morning. that being said, my spiritual journey, as much as the reading seems to imply, does not match the reality of who i am and what my mornings are like. it is, therefore, no wonder i find this metaphor a bit strained.
for me, it would not have been an alarm clock that started the awakening of the spirit, it would have been more like a disaster klaxon, and the gentle nudging, would be better described as pulled out of bed by the short hairs. there was nothing kinder, softer or gentler about how i arrived in the rooms, even the fact that the obsession to use had left me, many days after that particular event occurred, was like a hard slap in the face. i used to envy those who came in because they had the gift of desperation, and told them they came in the easier softer way, as evidenced in this particular reading. the fact is, as violent and disruptive as my awakening to the fact that i am an addict was, i had the easier softer way. neither of the two choices presented to me, way back when, was particularly palatable to me, and i chose the least distasteful one, the road of recovery.
as the reading clearly states, the last thing i expected was a spiritual awakening of any sort, much less a desire not to use, extending for more than six thousand days in a row. i never meant to be where i am, and as i strive to awaken the spirit of others, today, i lack the grace and deft touch, this reading speaks about. i am blunt, direct and certainly straight to the point, because that is just how i am. i am a perfect example, that even the unwilling and more than likely undeserving, can be awoken to this manner of living, and come to embrace it as if it always was part of who they were.
anyhow, Saturday morning is calling me to get out of the house and get busy with what i need to do. as i am quite awake already, i guess i will go with the flow and see what happens.

∞ DT ∞