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some days it feels as if the person i once was, was a character in a film set in a galaxy far, far away. other days, it feels like i have not change at all.today, i am certainly somewhere in between. what i am learning, or at least what i felt this morning, is that IF i want to become something more than i am today, then i need to open my mind to brand new ideas, no matter how insane i judge them to be. before i launch into this little ditty:

TJ
i remember where i first met you,
and you have come a long way from there!
5 years of JFTs in a row is awesome
Keep Coming Back.

to explain that last notion, i often judge ideas as insane. especially ideas i get from others. that was how things worked back in the day, and as i stay clean, i am learning that it is more than likely ideas that arise within me, or more insane than those i hear from others. it is not as if my head is filled with one crazy notion after another, either. i have quite a few good ideas, and a plethora of bad ones. my job, there fore becomes, to seek out the collective wisdom of my friends, my sponsor, my peers, and my family, to temper or forge those insane ideas into good, workable ones. recycle the crazy into something better as it were.
speaking of new ideas, sandwiching my smokin' star wars afternoon, i got texts from two of my sponsees. what stand outs is the contrast between them. they are both on the same step. neither is exactly lightening fast in their current progress. one is working the step, the other is being worked over by the step. one is engaged in the process, the other is being worked over, quite brutally i may add, by the exact same process, and there is nothing i can do for either one, than to offer my time, my encouragement, my experience, my strength , my hope and the little bit of wisdom i have accumulated. that wisdom is the collective result of the new ideas, i finally let into my being, and although i may have not been an early adopter, i finally did allow them to take hold. notions such as i am only going to have friends, by reaching out and being a friend. i need to earn the respect and trust of all those who come into my life. and most importantly: I AM AN ADDICT.
good ideas and bad ideas, come and go, but regardless of that, i am first and foremost an addict, and i have come to NEED my friends, family members, peers and acquiescence. my reintroduction into the human race, from that galaxy far, far away, is an ongoing process, and one i cherish today. it is a great day and yes, May the Force be with YOU!

∞ DT ∞