ฮฑ i have a gift?! ฮฑ
Posted: Fri, Sep 30, 2005 05:26:10 AM
well the last thing i expected to be blogging about this morning was a gift that i have to give other recovering addicts. the part of me i call my disease tells me that my experience in recovery is far too brief and without much substance, so although i may have a gift is has little value.
i understand that my inner voice is often hijacked by the addict within and that since i am my disease, everything i know or understand will and is being used against me. it is more than a bit disturbing that i can twist humility into self-abuse. living in the here and now into apathy and hope into expectations.
the truth of the matter is that i have been working a program of recovery for some time now and no matter what my disease tells me, i do have a gift to share with others. the hope that they too can stay clean, the miracle of a new day clean, and the joy of discovering that it was the disease and not some inner beast that made the act the way they did!
so off to missoula and into another round of representing the addicts who trust me enough to send me there!
:) DT :))
i understand that my inner voice is often hijacked by the addict within and that since i am my disease, everything i know or understand will and is being used against me. it is more than a bit disturbing that i can twist humility into self-abuse. living in the here and now into apathy and hope into expectations.
the truth of the matter is that i have been working a program of recovery for some time now and no matter what my disease tells me, i do have a gift to share with others. the hope that they too can stay clean, the miracle of a new day clean, and the joy of discovering that it was the disease and not some inner beast that made the act the way they did!
so off to missoula and into another round of representing the addicts who trust me enough to send me there!
:) DT :))