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i have often said when i ask for something in prayer, that i get one of three answers, **YES,** **NO,** or **NOT YET.** most of the time, i cannot tell the difference between NO and NOT YET, and often take that as a **sign** that i need to apply some self-will to make it so. what i heard from the reading this morning, was that perhaps i should stop asking for anything more than the power to stay clean and assistance in uncovering the “next right thing.” as boring as that may sound to me, perhaps as i discovered yesterday afternoon, knowledge is not as powerful as i thought it might be. knowledge that is gained by application of my self-will, that is and not from “feeling” my way to the answers.
moving on, i am alone in my home for the next few weeks, as the love of my life is on the trip to Asia, with her family. this morning i realize it will be up to me, to choose what sort of existence i desire over the course of that absence. i got to finish a Netflix mini-series last night, one whose ending i found far from satisfactory, but i am now quite certain that streaming shows is not what i want to do, once i am set free from being on-call Sunday evening. in fact, what i am “hearing” this morning, is that i will need to make the effort to get out and about, as it has been over twelve hours since i last spoke to another human being. once upon a time, that was a great place for me to be, today, not so much. what i am also feeling this morning, other than being a bit “fuzzy” from taking a prescribed medication last night, is that i can do what i want, but what is it i want to do? the answer to that question will be revealed as the day rolls along, but just for right now, it is time for me and the dawg to take a walk through the neighborhood.

∞ DT ∞