๐ it is ๐
Posted: Sun, Jul 7, 2019 05:29:11 PM
the message that brings recovery, not the messenger. BUMMER, i had always thought is was ME that was bringing recovery to the local masses, after all i have been through the steps. done my share of service to the fellowship and been around for a minute or so. 😉 although i may be joking about that today, there was a time when i believed that it was my mission in life to bring recovery to my home town and i was the reason it was spreading. the actual truth, back then and certainly today, it is not me, but the message i carry. when that message comes from my heart and not my head, i may actually reach one more addict who is desperately looking for something different. sometimes, they seem to get it without any input from me and stay clean for “significant” amounts of clean time. i GET to witness their transformation into recovering addicts:
what i heard this morning is certainly gone, gone, gone, as i climbed Twin Sisters Peak, with a friend today. my greatest fear was that i would set a pace far too slow, and not be able to keep up with him as we trekked up and down the trail. when i got into that fear, i could have looked at the level of physical activity i have added to my life over the past fourteen months and believed what my FitBit was telling me about my current fitness status. instead i went to the old story that i was not “good enough” to be on par with a friend, and i would embarrass myself severely. that did not happen and i will spend a week trying to recover from my exertions today, but it is “good” recovery, because i got off my a$$ and did something challenging and certainly well within my range. with that thought in mind, i think the “GOD” i saw in my friend and peer was that he was ready to allow me not to fail and was pleasantly surprised that we could hike at a pace that the both of us found both comfortable and fast enough. what i walk away with, is that although that story may play non-stop in my head, more and more it is being revealed for the lie it is. that story is intended to keep me from reaching my potential, just because i am afraid to reach out for it. i am beginning to see that the evidence is proving that story false and i am more than worth doing something more challenging with the manner in which i live today.
Kerri T
ELEVEN (11) years clean!
I am glad i stuck around to watch you stick around, as well.
what i heard this morning is certainly gone, gone, gone, as i climbed Twin Sisters Peak, with a friend today. my greatest fear was that i would set a pace far too slow, and not be able to keep up with him as we trekked up and down the trail. when i got into that fear, i could have looked at the level of physical activity i have added to my life over the past fourteen months and believed what my FitBit was telling me about my current fitness status. instead i went to the old story that i was not “good enough” to be on par with a friend, and i would embarrass myself severely. that did not happen and i will spend a week trying to recover from my exertions today, but it is “good” recovery, because i got off my a$$ and did something challenging and certainly well within my range. with that thought in mind, i think the “GOD” i saw in my friend and peer was that he was ready to allow me not to fail and was pleasantly surprised that we could hike at a pace that the both of us found both comfortable and fast enough. what i walk away with, is that although that story may play non-stop in my head, more and more it is being revealed for the lie it is. that story is intended to keep me from reaching my potential, just because i am afraid to reach out for it. i am beginning to see that the evidence is proving that story false and i am more than worth doing something more challenging with the manner in which i live today.
∞ DT ∞