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got to admit it, today i kicked into my Defender of the Faith mode. what started out as a discussion about what happened at a service body meeting last week, was topped off by another addict*s experience with a group far from home. all in all, nothing to trip me off. however when another of my peers started to defend their use of a very specific prayer to close their meeting, one that is used by other fellowships, i wanted to jump down their throat and feed them the line from our literature that says that a member's right to a HIGHER POWER of their understanding, is absolute and irrevocable. instead i said a little piece about endorsing a religion and walked away, but i was fuming never the less and wanted to text them and let them know how fVcking wrong they were.
the good news is that i did not say or do anything that requires the corrective action of a TENTH STEP and i considered the source. they are certainly of of our members who does not see the wisdom in being in a single fellowship and has been “polluted” by how other fellowships do their stuff. in fact, they sere surprised to hear the statement from our literature that says “one promise, many gifts.” they thought it was something the speaker this morning created and not that our speaker was quoting liberally from the written word that comprises our program of recovery.
the bad news, is that i thought i had grown beyond, being upset when someone openly displayed their lack of knowledge of how and why we do things the way we do. i lost my composure and certainly took my anger out on the drivers i shared the road with, on my way home. this is something i will need to consider through the lens of my TENTH STEP tonight, how to deal with those who seem to believe that all “recovery” programs are the same, even when they have time in our program. now that i have eaten and dumped my little drop of poison, i feel more balanced and ready to move on with the rest of my day. it is a good day to be clean and a better one to seek balance between what is and what i think is.

∞ DT ∞