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there is a reason for this: the defects i identify most easily in others are often the defects i am most familiar with in my own character.
so here i sit, working on my current assignment to finish my sixth step process and once again the reading seems to be speaking to me about one of my favorite activities, taking the inventory of other people.
i almost laughed out loud when i read this little ditty this morning, because the stress of being with a whole bunch of using people without any phone service, allowed me the freedom to engage heavily in this particular activity, when i was away down south last week.
so as a wake-up call, and a reminder, this reading has prompted me to try something different, at least today. what i am going to try to do, is to flip this behavior over. when i find myself looking at the defective characters of those i encounter across the course of living today, i will try and find something that is a character asset in them. perhaps, looking for the positive in someone else, will help me focus on the positive aspects of my own character. i am getting quite weary of living as a defective character, and that in my experience is a sign that the sixth step process is working and approaching its conclusion. of course, that is not for me to decide, much as i would like to. that is for my sponsor through the guidance of a POWER GREATER THAN ME to help me determine. dang it!
well my well of inspiration has dried up, and perhaps that is also a sign that i have thought about my defective character enough for the present. yes i am grateful i get the chance to write this on a nearly daily basis, however it is time to move off of the defect of character train and on to the surrender train. even though i cannot officially move forward today, emotionally i am ready to become more than the sum of my character defects. after all, if i want to suffer the slings and arrows of ignominious defeat, all i have to do is say F*CK IT and use. and to use today is not my desire.

∞ DT ∞