๐ tapping into ๐
Posted: Fri, Dec 19, 2025 11:12:33 AM
my own inner wisdom and allowing my conscience to guide my actions. morals, values and society, have always been a slippery slope for me. in active addiction i was a great fan of situational ethics, which meant i had none when it came to fulfilling my desires. as i got clean, i saw more and more that what i thought was the next right thing to do, for me anyhow, was not necessarily the next right thing to do at all. it was not about right or wrong, it was all about consequences that i could accept, that determined the rightness or wrongness of my next action. living life under those constraints was not that tough, but i was really bad at predicting consequences and missed more times than not and ended up not being able to accept what came. what that did teach me was to be more present for where things may go.
as i worked more steps and spent a year or more writing out my Tenth Step every night, due to some misplaced hopes and expectations on others, i became painfully aware that i actually did have morals, values and a conscience and situational ethics would no longer work for me. more and more, i grew tired of my &$#8220;litany of sins” and learned how to practice a Tenth Step in real-time, if it felt wrong, i could choose not to do it, even if i was willing to accept whatever consequences that might come from going down that path.
the nice part of that year of writing, is that today, i quietly meditate for my daily inventory and look at how i feel, what is holding me back and every now and again something i need to clean up that i missed in real time. the fact that i am present enough to to ask whether or not i want to:
as i worked more steps and spent a year or more writing out my Tenth Step every night, due to some misplaced hopes and expectations on others, i became painfully aware that i actually did have morals, values and a conscience and situational ethics would no longer work for me. more and more, i grew tired of my &$#8220;litany of sins” and learned how to practice a Tenth Step in real-time, if it felt wrong, i could choose not to do it, even if i was willing to accept whatever consequences that might come from going down that path.
the nice part of that year of writing, is that today, i quietly meditate for my daily inventory and look at how i feel, what is holding me back and every now and again something i need to clean up that i missed in real time. the fact that i am present enough to to ask whether or not i want to:
- admit i am wrong in the here and now
- or have to clean it up by a text at 9:30 PM
∞ DT ∞