Some memes

divine in me is what is genuine. okay, that is even a bit of a stretch for me, i may be vain and a more than a bit egotistical, but claiming any sort of divinity is usually not my style. and yet, when i read that line in my source material, this morning, it struck me as something i certainly needed to listen for when i sat to enter the void. i know that the fellowship is attempting to adhere more to the notion of each and every member has the absolute right to find whatever HIGHER POWER they may choose. as a result, more and more of the Judaeo-Christian tradition is getting stripped away. i guess divinity is not just part of the religious tradition, but when i consider being divine, i get a bit nervous about falling into the trap well if i am divine, then i must be less fallible as well. and <BOOM> there i am in the same sort of unmanageability of living in a world that does not conform to my wishes and expectations.
the nice part of this morning, was that i looked for my genuine self and did not worry whether or not it was divine or not. as the morning progressed i saw more and more of who i truly am and did not feed the beast of my ego. yes, i am much better at being my genuine self and sharing that with the people in my life than i have ever been before, even before i first picked up. i no longer live in abject fear of intimacy and others seeing me for who i am, which is quite a step forward. i am more comfortable in my own skin and even when i am getting yelled at about doing something, someone does not approve of, i do not have to take on any of their stuff. whether i was right or wrong hardly matters after the fact and today, i can walk tall and know that i am far from perfect, but much more “divine” than any other time in my life, just for today.

∞ DT ∞