Blog entry for:

well i have had my life on hold for the past year, after accomplishing a dream i have had since i was very young. part of it has been fear -- ‘ what if i am no good at my new job ’, ‘ what if i cannot find something that satisfies me ’ , ‘ what if i have to give up a part of me ’ and so on ....
part of not fulfilling my dream was waiting to see what would happen with my friend Jim, well that excuse has now been taken from me. moving forward with my life is what has always been my true will for myself and i am sure that if i had the chance to talk with my friend Jim about this issue he would laugh and ask me what it was exactly i feared about finding a job that paid me more money, had more challenges and possibly might be a bit more mentally stimulating.
i am unsure whether i am more afraid to fail or succeed, so here i sit whining about how terrible my current life is, and yet i do nothing but sit on my big fat keester, emulating life and wishing i could have more.
the reading this morning was about taking the action, doing the footwork and living our dreams. so my action today will be to grieve for my lost friend, remember that for him this is a blessing -- he no longer needs to suffer the ravages of cancer, and see what i can do to honor his memory with doing what it takes to be the man i have always dreamed of being.
∞ DT ∞