Blog entry for:
Tue, Nov 1, 2005 05:51:23 AM
α keeping my gifts ω
posted: Tue, Nov 1, 2005 05:51:23 AM
one of which is the love and grace i have been given from GOD since starting down the path of recovery. the literature of the program that saved my life tells me, "that we can only keep what we have by giving it away." and the paradoxical nature of that statement has always bugged me.
part of my problem with this comes from my experience in active addiction, the more i gave, the less i seemed to get, and of course, i always wanted more not less! even when i was struggling to get clean, it seemed that the more i took, the more i had, love, acceptance, material wealth and respect. the only thing i could not get was clean -- no matter how hard i tried. so i faked it, waiting for something, anything different to happen. well GOD loved me enough to put the final event into my life, that allowed me to discover the desperation i needed to begin to open my mind to a new way of life.
so when confronted by the apparent paradoxical nature of keeping GOD‘s love by giving it away today, i look at the evidence that has accumulated since that september day not too long ago and see that it is true. i can only keep what i have by giving it away! and for my own selfish motives i think i will give some more away today!
∞ DT ∞
part of my problem with this comes from my experience in active addiction, the more i gave, the less i seemed to get, and of course, i always wanted more not less! even when i was struggling to get clean, it seemed that the more i took, the more i had, love, acceptance, material wealth and respect. the only thing i could not get was clean -- no matter how hard i tried. so i faked it, waiting for something, anything different to happen. well GOD loved me enough to put the final event into my life, that allowed me to discover the desperation i needed to begin to open my mind to a new way of life.
so when confronted by the apparent paradoxical nature of keeping GOD‘s love by giving it away today, i look at the evidence that has accumulated since that september day not too long ago and see that it is true. i can only keep what i have by giving it away! and for my own selfish motives i think i will give some more away today!
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
giving away love 206 words ➥ Monday, November 1, 2004 by: donnotα i did not want to live with the problems i had created for myself. ω 516 words ➥ Wednesday, November 1, 2006 by: donnot
∞ in recovery i get more -- more than just not using. ∞ 381 words ➥ Thursday, November 1, 2007 by: donnot
↔ recovery awakens me from the nightmare of self-centeredness, strife, and insecurity … 413 words ➥ Saturday, November 1, 2008 by: donnot
∪ addiction caused me to think almost exclusively of myself ∪ 616 words ➥ Sunday, November 1, 2009 by: donnot
± relieved of my incessant insecurity, i no longer see the world ± 625 words ➥ Monday, November 1, 2010 by: donnot
& while in active addiction, even my prayers & 541 words ➥ Tuesday, November 1, 2011 by: donnot
♥ i will seek help in giving away the love ♥ 559 words ➥ Thursday, November 1, 2012 by: donnot
¡ there are still some days when i do not want to live with the problems i create for myself ! 770 words ➥ Friday, November 1, 2013 by: donnot
∗ i have awoken to a new reality: ∗ 617 words ➥ Saturday, November 1, 2014 by: donnot
℘ awakening ℘ 675 words ➥ Sunday, November 1, 2015 by: donnot
🎯 in recovery 🎯 769 words ➥ Tuesday, November 1, 2016 by: donnot
🎆 living THE life 🎇 551 words ➥ Wednesday, November 1, 2017 by: donnot
🙻 asking GOD to 🙻 666 words ➥ Thursday, November 1, 2018 by: donnot
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🌱 instant gratification, 🏳 543 words ➥ Sunday, November 1, 2020 by: donnot
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🤨 recognizing where 🤨 457 words ➥ Friday, November 1, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
4) Therefore the sage desires what (other men) do not desire, and
does not prize things difficult to get; he learns what (other men)
do not learn, and turns back to what the multitude of men have passed
by. Thus he helps the natural development of all things, and does
not dare to act (with an ulterior purpose of his own).