Blog entry for:
Sun, Sep 2, 2018 11:44:20 AM
🚔 changing from what 🚚
posted: Sun, Sep 2, 2018 11:44:20 AM
i once was, into something more, is quite a feat and an undertaking i do not not take lightly.
ah, the reading seems to be about becoming driven by a POWER greater than myself. in years past, that just might have been what i heard. this year, however, what i heard as i sat this morning was a different drummer as it were. there certainly is a transformation underway in my life and the process of morphing into a person i was never capable of becoming “back in the day,” is still underway. the problem i have these days with these HIGHER POWER readings, is that as i examine what i have come to believe and accept that it is certainly more than okay to walk off the beaten path, color out of the lines as it were, i find these reading a little less fitting, at least on the surface. when i take a minute to allow what i read to sink in, i often find there is a whole lot more shaking going on.
today, is a perfect example. yes i have found a spiritual path that does not have any sort of “SUPREME BEING.” for me, that is a relief, as across the years i have had to suppress what i felt in my heart and defer to what i thought in my head. over and over again, i attempted to take into my heart, the notion of a HIGHER POWER that was more akin to that of my peers, and over and over again, i was only partly successful, always feeling as if i still was missing something. i certainly was missing something, an idea that fit! as i am still quite good and “fitting in” when i think i need to be, i could look good and still be all messed up on the inside. life inside this recovery journey was far from calm, serene or peaceful, as the war raged on day after day, about what path to take. my last ELEVENTH STEP, finally allowed me to surrender to what is and be who i am. speaking of being who they are:
ah, the reading seems to be about becoming driven by a POWER greater than myself. in years past, that just might have been what i heard. this year, however, what i heard as i sat this morning was a different drummer as it were. there certainly is a transformation underway in my life and the process of morphing into a person i was never capable of becoming “back in the day,” is still underway. the problem i have these days with these HIGHER POWER readings, is that as i examine what i have come to believe and accept that it is certainly more than okay to walk off the beaten path, color out of the lines as it were, i find these reading a little less fitting, at least on the surface. when i take a minute to allow what i read to sink in, i often find there is a whole lot more shaking going on.
today, is a perfect example. yes i have found a spiritual path that does not have any sort of “SUPREME BEING.” for me, that is a relief, as across the years i have had to suppress what i felt in my heart and defer to what i thought in my head. over and over again, i attempted to take into my heart, the notion of a HIGHER POWER that was more akin to that of my peers, and over and over again, i was only partly successful, always feeling as if i still was missing something. i certainly was missing something, an idea that fit! as i am still quite good and “fitting in” when i think i need to be, i could look good and still be all messed up on the inside. life inside this recovery journey was far from calm, serene or peaceful, as the war raged on day after day, about what path to take. my last ELEVENTH STEP, finally allowed me to surrender to what is and be who i am. speaking of being who they are:
Scott K,
a newcomer no more!.
Congrats on making it to FIVE (5) years clean, just for today.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
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☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
3) Their court(-yards and buildings) shall be well kept, but their
fields shall be ill-cultivated, and their granaries very empty. They
shall wear elegant and ornamented robes, carry a sharp sword at their
girdle, pamper themselves in eating and drinking, and have a superabundance
of property and wealth;--such (princes) may be called robbers and
boasters. This is contrary to the Tao surely!