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my time fighting for the outcome i desire is my default behavior. listening for the answers from the POWER that fuels my recovery is something i strive to do. am i good at it? well, i am better than i used to be, to say anything more would be an exaggeration. i am still not certain if the prayer that i do daily is superstition or helping matters, BUT, and yes it a HUGE one, i am okay with keeping as part of my daily routine.
i am way behind the curve at my new job and that just may be because i am expecting more than i can deliver, as it is only my second day. i wanted to hit the ground running and it feels as if i am crawling. as this day goes on, i certainly am looking forward to actually doing some work. i may have found how to get rolling in the morning, while there is still light in the morning at 6:45 AM. i am sure that as the seasons change, that too will need to change and i am not sure how that will work out.
what i do “know” this morning, is that my new job did not hire me to fill a seat. i want to fit in and be a part of their solution, rather than worrying about not being “up to snuff.” that sort of thing triggers a reaction for me to pray, see above. what i am going to do instead, is to let go, have a bit of FAITH in my ability to learn and allow myself the freedom to do so. it is a good day to be clean and a better day to see what i can accomplish.

∞ DT ∞