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of cosmic tests or is it just life on its own terms? the answer to that question certainly depends on my spiritual fitness and how centered i happen to be on my spiritual path. i can certainly say that this last trip around the star that provides the ingredients for life on this planet. has been one of those i would have rather skipped. i certainly have been “tested” over the course of that journey and i would like to say that i “passed with flying colors.” of course, that is no longer the direction in which i swing. i spent enough of my life playing the victim to “fates and forces” and wailing about how unjust and unfair life was to me. today, i accept that i have to deal with the ups and downs of living in the real world. today, i take responsibility for my life and use the power that i have, to make the choices that lead to acceptable consequences. that means that when numerous people in my life are telling me that i am not listening, perhaps i would better served to take that criticism as reality and make an effort to actively listen to what those around me are saying. of course, that is dependent on whether or not i actually “hear” that criticism and have not, in self-will, deluded the living shit out of myself.
it is interesting that i have been seeing so many of the consequences of someone else's self-will, writ large, all around me. it is just after 8 AM and my plans have been severely affected by forces outside of my control. my temporary crown is falling apart, i have two job interviews and another recruiter that wishes to prep me for another interview on Thursday. needless to say, it means that running is out of the question, but i just may decide to shower and shave, anyhow and run later today. being flexible is not normally in my wheelhouse, but i know it is a skill that i can exercise, at least this morning. the time has come, therefor, to post this, be okay with allowing myself to change my routine and see what happens as this day progresses. today is not a test, just another day in the life of this recovering addict.

∞ DT ∞