¿ is it really a test of my character ,
Posted: Sat, Feb 7, 2015 07:58:21 AM
by some divine POWER, when i am faced with a situation where i could do something unprincipled without getting caught? in my opinion, not by a long shot, but then i find the whole notion that there are two diametrically opposed forces battling for my eternal soul, more than a bit conceited and arrogant.
yes the notion that the POWER that fuels my recovery would set up a series of tasks and ethical decisions, just to test my adherence to this way of life, is even more ludicrous to me. i am much more than a collections of feelings, character defects and unbridled impulses. i am a human being, with some sort of free-will, although that could be arguable, that is an addict, who chooses to be in recovery today. i don not have a devil on one shoulder, a committee in my head, or some outside voice telling me what i should do, but i am faced with opportunities to do unprincipled actions on a daily basis, just by being alive and kicking that sort of stuff happens to me, every single day. so have the conceited notion that somehow powerful forces are throwing things in my way to test my resolve, puts me on the level of the biblical person of JOB, and that set of tests was a wager between competing forces, which males that whole notion even more distasteful to me.
i am given a daily reprieve form the horrors of active addiction,i understand that, and do my best to live up to that gift. i am also challenged by living life in a world with billions of other human beings, whose actions, tiny or great, may or may not have a profound affect on my life. today, ISIL is not marching into my home town, but my government may or may not be monitoring what i say and do, so who do i fear more? ISIL, as they seem to operating with a moral compass beyond my ken. which of those two has the most effect on what i do? why the NSA of course, as their moral compass is so far out of whack that i barely comprehend what the fVck they think they are doing. the actions of my government have a greater chance of affecting my daily life and yet i fear them the least. in my mind, both the NSA and ISIL are operating in a realm that is so far from the mainstream that their actions are neither understandable nor comprehensible and neither are doing anything to make me safer,m saner or live in greater confidence of seeing another sunrise. life still goes on, and i am grateful that today, i do not have to understand all that i see, and i can dismiss that which i fear that has the least impact on my life today. today, getting run over or in a fatal auto accident are greater possibilities than the so-called guardians of my freedom. the only freedom they seem to be guarding today, is that of the multinational corporations to take the last shekel out of my pocket and keep me numbed by television and fake competition of staged sporting events, so i cannot see what is really happening in my life. after all, a lesson from the Roams, give the people their bread and circuses and you can get away with the most outrageous and heinous stuff, just ask Brian Williams, who apparently has been telling tales for years.
yes the notion that the POWER that fuels my recovery would set up a series of tasks and ethical decisions, just to test my adherence to this way of life, is even more ludicrous to me. i am much more than a collections of feelings, character defects and unbridled impulses. i am a human being, with some sort of free-will, although that could be arguable, that is an addict, who chooses to be in recovery today. i don not have a devil on one shoulder, a committee in my head, or some outside voice telling me what i should do, but i am faced with opportunities to do unprincipled actions on a daily basis, just by being alive and kicking that sort of stuff happens to me, every single day. so have the conceited notion that somehow powerful forces are throwing things in my way to test my resolve, puts me on the level of the biblical person of JOB, and that set of tests was a wager between competing forces, which males that whole notion even more distasteful to me.
i am given a daily reprieve form the horrors of active addiction,i understand that, and do my best to live up to that gift. i am also challenged by living life in a world with billions of other human beings, whose actions, tiny or great, may or may not have a profound affect on my life. today, ISIL is not marching into my home town, but my government may or may not be monitoring what i say and do, so who do i fear more? ISIL, as they seem to operating with a moral compass beyond my ken. which of those two has the most effect on what i do? why the NSA of course, as their moral compass is so far out of whack that i barely comprehend what the fVck they think they are doing. the actions of my government have a greater chance of affecting my daily life and yet i fear them the least. in my mind, both the NSA and ISIL are operating in a realm that is so far from the mainstream that their actions are neither understandable nor comprehensible and neither are doing anything to make me safer,m saner or live in greater confidence of seeing another sunrise. life still goes on, and i am grateful that today, i do not have to understand all that i see, and i can dismiss that which i fear that has the least impact on my life today. today, getting run over or in a fatal auto accident are greater possibilities than the so-called guardians of my freedom. the only freedom they seem to be guarding today, is that of the multinational corporations to take the last shekel out of my pocket and keep me numbed by television and fake competition of staged sporting events, so i cannot see what is really happening in my life. after all, a lesson from the Roams, give the people their bread and circuses and you can get away with the most outrageous and heinous stuff, just ask Brian Williams, who apparently has been telling tales for years.
∞ DT ∞