Blog entry for:
Sat, Feb 7, 2015 07:58:21 AM
¿ is it really a test of my character ,
posted: Sat, Feb 7, 2015 07:58:21 AM
by some divine POWER, when i am faced with a situation where i could do something unprincipled without getting caught? in my opinion, not by a long shot, but then i find the whole notion that there are two diametrically opposed forces battling for my eternal soul, more than a bit conceited and arrogant.
yes the notion that the POWER that fuels my recovery would set up a series of tasks and ethical decisions, just to test my adherence to this way of life, is even more ludicrous to me. i am much more than a collections of feelings, character defects and unbridled impulses. i am a human being, with some sort of free-will, although that could be arguable, that is an addict, who chooses to be in recovery today. i don not have a devil on one shoulder, a committee in my head, or some outside voice telling me what i should do, but i am faced with opportunities to do unprincipled actions on a daily basis, just by being alive and kicking that sort of stuff happens to me, every single day. so have the conceited notion that somehow powerful forces are throwing things in my way to test my resolve, puts me on the level of the biblical person of JOB, and that set of tests was a wager between competing forces, which males that whole notion even more distasteful to me.
i am given a daily reprieve form the horrors of active addiction,i understand that, and do my best to live up to that gift. i am also challenged by living life in a world with billions of other human beings, whose actions, tiny or great, may or may not have a profound affect on my life. today, ISIL is not marching into my home town, but my government may or may not be monitoring what i say and do, so who do i fear more? ISIL, as they seem to operating with a moral compass beyond my ken. which of those two has the most effect on what i do? why the NSA of course, as their moral compass is so far out of whack that i barely comprehend what the fVck they think they are doing. the actions of my government have a greater chance of affecting my daily life and yet i fear them the least. in my mind, both the NSA and ISIL are operating in a realm that is so far from the mainstream that their actions are neither understandable nor comprehensible and neither are doing anything to make me safer,m saner or live in greater confidence of seeing another sunrise. life still goes on, and i am grateful that today, i do not have to understand all that i see, and i can dismiss that which i fear that has the least impact on my life today. today, getting run over or in a fatal auto accident are greater possibilities than the so-called guardians of my freedom. the only freedom they seem to be guarding today, is that of the multinational corporations to take the last shekel out of my pocket and keep me numbed by television and fake competition of staged sporting events, so i cannot see what is really happening in my life. after all, a lesson from the Roams, give the people their bread and circuses and you can get away with the most outrageous and heinous stuff, just ask Brian Williams, who apparently has been telling tales for years.
yes the notion that the POWER that fuels my recovery would set up a series of tasks and ethical decisions, just to test my adherence to this way of life, is even more ludicrous to me. i am much more than a collections of feelings, character defects and unbridled impulses. i am a human being, with some sort of free-will, although that could be arguable, that is an addict, who chooses to be in recovery today. i don not have a devil on one shoulder, a committee in my head, or some outside voice telling me what i should do, but i am faced with opportunities to do unprincipled actions on a daily basis, just by being alive and kicking that sort of stuff happens to me, every single day. so have the conceited notion that somehow powerful forces are throwing things in my way to test my resolve, puts me on the level of the biblical person of JOB, and that set of tests was a wager between competing forces, which males that whole notion even more distasteful to me.
i am given a daily reprieve form the horrors of active addiction,i understand that, and do my best to live up to that gift. i am also challenged by living life in a world with billions of other human beings, whose actions, tiny or great, may or may not have a profound affect on my life. today, ISIL is not marching into my home town, but my government may or may not be monitoring what i say and do, so who do i fear more? ISIL, as they seem to operating with a moral compass beyond my ken. which of those two has the most effect on what i do? why the NSA of course, as their moral compass is so far out of whack that i barely comprehend what the fVck they think they are doing. the actions of my government have a greater chance of affecting my daily life and yet i fear them the least. in my mind, both the NSA and ISIL are operating in a realm that is so far from the mainstream that their actions are neither understandable nor comprehensible and neither are doing anything to make me safer,m saner or live in greater confidence of seeing another sunrise. life still goes on, and i am grateful that today, i do not have to understand all that i see, and i can dismiss that which i fear that has the least impact on my life today. today, getting run over or in a fatal auto accident are greater possibilities than the so-called guardians of my freedom. the only freedom they seem to be guarding today, is that of the multinational corporations to take the last shekel out of my pocket and keep me numbed by television and fake competition of staged sporting events, so i cannot see what is really happening in my life. after all, a lesson from the Roams, give the people their bread and circuses and you can get away with the most outrageous and heinous stuff, just ask Brian Williams, who apparently has been telling tales for years.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
↔ this is not a test ↔ 314 words ➥ Monday, February 7, 2005 by: donnot↔ life is... ↔ 402 words ➥ Tuesday, February 7, 2006 by: donnot
α the hardships of life are a series of cosmic tests designed to teach me something? ω 570 words ➥ Wednesday, February 7, 2007 by: donnot
μ life can be terribly painful at times, but the pain is not inflicted on me by my HIGHER POWER. μ 498 words ➥ Thursday, February 7, 2008 by: donnot
α i came to recovery with the impression that the hardships of life are a series of cosmic tests ω 559 words ➥ Saturday, February 7, 2009 by: donnot
¿ the belief that the hardships of life are some sort of cosmic test ¿ 627 words ➥ Sunday, February 7, 2010 by: donnot
Α i have found a loving, personal HIGHER POWER, to whom i can turn Ω 855 words ➥ Monday, February 7, 2011 by: donnot
♥ there is no harm that life can do me ♥ 840 words ➥ Tuesday, February 7, 2012 by: donnot
• when something traumatic happens and i may be tempted to wail, • 396 words ➥ Thursday, February 7, 2013 by: donnot
♦ i will have faith that the will of the POWER ♦ 678 words ➥ Friday, February 7, 2014 by: donnot
✠ this is ☮ 606 words ➥ Sunday, February 7, 2016 by: donnot
☯ life just happens, ☤ 672 words ➥ Tuesday, February 7, 2017 by: donnot
🌬 a series of 🌡 722 words ➥ Wednesday, February 7, 2018 by: donnot
😬 when something traumatic happens, 😭 576 words ➥ Thursday, February 7, 2019 by: donnot
🗣 testing, testing, 🗫 737 words ➥ Friday, February 7, 2020 by: donnot
💪 testing my recovery, 💀 444 words ➥ Sunday, February 7, 2021 by: donnot
🗹 a series 🗹 401 words ➥ Monday, February 7, 2022 by: donnot
🤕 not a test, 🤒 512 words ➥ Tuesday, February 7, 2023 by: donnot
🌬 recovery makes 🌀 542 words ➥ Wednesday, February 7, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
2) It is only by this moderation that there is effected an early return
(to man's normal state). That early return is what I call the repeated
accumulation of the attributes (of the Tao). With that repeated accumulation
of those attributes, there comes the subjugation (of every obstacle
to such return). Of this subjugation we know not what shall be the
limit; and when one knows not what the limit shall be, he may be the
ruler of a state.