Blog entry for:

to hold on to the most destructive traits i possess, just is not worth it, even though i often wonder what i would be like, if i let them go. well i am back in my groove again, actually taking the time to pause and reflect on what i heard as i sat this morning. it was actually the second day in a row that i read the reading about defects, as i did a just for tomorrow, yesterday morning. in fact, yesterday was sort of a weird day for me. what looked like ignominious defeat turned into victories. what felt “wrong” was actually the next right thing to do. i often have days like that, but not as many as i used to.
this morning, i took care of something my partner has been asking me to do, between checking my Fantasy Football scores and bemoaning the fact i left one of my “high-scorers” on my bench. as i stumble towards getting up the gumption to dress out and head out into this frigid November morn, i know that i have all sorts of defects of characters that i choose to cling to, in the here and now. i hold on to them, because they are familiar and with the upheaval going on in my personal life, they feel like something i can “count” on being there. as sick as that may sound, and trust me, it sounds deranged and insane to me as well, it is part of my reality these days and perhaps an indication that i need to get moving on my step work.
i am a bit bummed that i had to put in extra hours over the course of this weekend, in order to have most of next weekend off. such is the life of contract labor, do not work, do not get paid 😭 😭 😭! on that happy thought, it is time to bundle up and get out and about. those calories will not burn themselves, at least not at the rate i desire. nor will those fat cells be diminished in size and quantity, without my daily effort. it is a good day to be clean and to consider that i will be better off, and certainly more like the person i have always wanted to be, if i choose to let go a character defect or three, just for today.

∞ DT ∞