Blog entry for:

have my own ideas and desires and more than once they seem to be contrary to what the next correct thing was for me to do. here is where i get in trouble with the whole HIGHER POWER concept in recovery, how do i separate my will from the will of the POWER that fuels my recovery? i know i am certainly not the first addict in recovery to stumble on this concept and even though it is the topic i am expounding upon today, i will be far from the last. the simple fact is, for me, i really do not know what is truly my self-will and what is the will of the POWER that fuels my recovery, some stuff is easy, specifically staying clean, living an active program of recovery and doing my best to walk through life with a minimum of less than stellar consequences in my wake. others, not quite so black and white and here is where the “feeling” part replaces the thinking part, when it comes to these decisions.
over the past few days, i do believe someone is trying to hack into my FaceBook account, posing as a “friend” saying they need a “code” to unlock their FaceBook on their new IPhone. i am now suspicious and will not send any more codes and in fact have blocked them. ever since the call this morning at 5:00 AM, my “spidey senses” have been tingling that i am being phished. well i will just need to stay logged in and active on at least one device, until i feel the danger may be over. i may have been born at night, but it was not last night.
so i guess it is time to dress out and get out for my neighborhood 10K, before i do or say something that will require an admission of wrongdoing and a correction to my behavior, as i am very close to doing so, right here and right now. it is a good day to be clean and a better day to allow myself the freedom to be okay with helping others without getting my panties all in a bunch, because they are interrupting my “finely-tuned” Sunday schedule of events. 🤣 🤣 🤣

∞ DT ∞