Blog entry for:

of the goodwill i practice today, may have been laid down in my service for recognition and approval phase. it certainly was not about serving anyone but myself and the message i carried was **look at me and give me praise for doing what all of you do not.** these days, i actually have a desire to serve and am a bit embarrassed when i am caught doing the next right thing, time and again, i work at being a part of and these days, when i become an distraction or an agent of chaos, i quietly end my participation, as i no longer see that my service is all about me. i certainly do not scorch and salt the landscape on my way out, as i have learned to leave before i start taking shit personally.
today, i am under the gun to get some stuff accomplished for the next sprint and have more than one item on my plate that requires a bit of research. this is a short day for me and serving my employer will require doing all the right stuff, until i take off for the afternoon. i really do not like the industry i am working for, but i really like my job and the freedom to work remotely most of the time. as a result, i get all sorts of conflicted about this or that, when all i have to do is keep pounding out the hits, and hits i what i have been slowly pounding out these days. i have all sorts of new burdens that i have been less than thrilled to take on, but i have got the word from on high that IF i want to continue at my position, then i NEED to pick up the slack.
back after a quick walk with the dawg. i have reduced my daily step goal to one that is achievable given my current injured reserve status and is a bit of a stretch. i feels as if i can accomplish this goal, as well as do my PT exercises and maintaining a work like balance that please my employer and is within my desires bucket. i know that i have this month to apply myself and it means a few more hours of work and a few less hours of doing everything else, but that is a price i am willing to pay.
on that topic, i guess it is time to get back to work and post this little ditty in a very public forum. today i have physical therapy, perhaps a meeting with one of the men that call me their sponsor and some homework to prep for my speaker gig, tomorrow afternoon. made me take the afternoon off, and actually own that i would not be working, instead of sliding it under their radar. perhaps i am getting better after all. 🧐

∞ DT ∞