Blog entry for:

for humility or how i learned to let go of the stuff that no longer works for me. this reminds me of an old joke, that in order to remember something, one has to forget something to make room. it is my contention that is a fallacy in either one of those cases. as i let go of my defects of character and accept myself for who i am, i am not actually discarding them, what i am doing however, is “making room” for how i respond rather than react. when i allow myself the freedom to let go of what i think i “need” to do and pause to suss out what i could do and make that choice, i am living in the spirit of the principle of humility. i have already had ample opportunity to do just that and as the day goes on, i am quite sure there will be more than one instance where i need to consider alternative behaviors to my default.
since returning from Africa, i see my workout time as an opportunity to digitally detox and i leave my phone at home. the world however, does not see it that way, and when i got back from my three mile walk, there was a drama brewing on my phone. my brother still believes he can drop my parent's dogs off at their house for my niece to watch them, without giving her any monetary compensation. he is also all over a bill that is over two years old, getting paid. my niece on the other hand, is squandering her free rent days, by not getting out and hitting the pavement, seeking employment. between the two of them, i am in a tight spot as both of them are resisting coming to terms with reality and i want to scream at them to GTFU!!!! the fact of the matter is, i have just gained control of the assets that have been left behind and as a result will start at the most urgent bills and work my way down. part of the reason i leave my phone behind is so that i can clear my mind of these details while i sweat a bit and get my pulse rate up to a place where it is improving my fitness. both of those family members have been living in denial and no matter what i say, they seem to want to stay in their comfortable little bubbles. those bubbles, however, are about to burst and things are about to get more than a bit messy and i am not going to shield either one of them from the consequences of their decisions not to make decisions.
so it is time to have a bite to eat and get ready to head out for an afternoon of cigar smoke, politically incorrect discussions and hanging with a friend or two. my phone? well it will be going with me, but the ringer will be turned off and i will choose to respond to those who may decide to interrupt my serenity this afternoon. after all, nothing is life and death in the aftermath of my Mom's death, at least not today. 😉

∞ DT ∞