๐ feel -> deal -> heal ๐
Posted: Sun, Apr 13, 2025 09:31:38 AM
whenever i come across a reading about feelings in my daily source material, i get a bit emotional :). this morning was no different and before i settled in for my dive into the void, one thing i came to see, after a minute or so clean, is that the trope: “feelings are not real,” has irked me since the very first time i heard it. i never knew why it made me uncomfortable and i have always, up until today, dismissed that feeling, as irrelevant and probably invalid. as i walked the dawg this morning, it came to me, that not only was my feeling about this trope real, i knew why. feelings are certainly REAL, my perception of the world as i feel something, however may not be. the trope i fall back on fits a whole lot better and feels a whole lot more accurate: “no one ever died from a feeling, it is their reaction to that feeling that may end up killing them,”
enough about tropes, reality and judging my feelings, what i “felt” this morning, as i sat, was a sense of peace and contentment. it is true, i may not have all that i want to have. it is also true that the chaos that is happening all around me, is more than a little off-putting. i am, however, feeling an end to my SECOND STEP, feeling good about my physical health and feeling as if i am finally helping one of the men i sponsor to move forward with his step work. the low impact workouts of the past four days, have me ready to run this morning and i am way ahead of my usual schedule.
all things considered, this is the best April, i have had in years. the rest of my life is not filled with death, dying, estates, addicts in active addiction or coming out from under a six decade fog. moving into my day, and i mean really moving as in running for over an hour, i do see that all of those feelings that i felt in the past were not only real, but the warped my perception of the world and allowed me to dive into being a victim, which is a behavior i though i long ago eliminated with extreme prejudice. 😁 just for today, i will take what i feel and make sure that i respond, rather than react. i will take the responsibility to deal with my feelings and allow myself to heal.
enough about tropes, reality and judging my feelings, what i “felt” this morning, as i sat, was a sense of peace and contentment. it is true, i may not have all that i want to have. it is also true that the chaos that is happening all around me, is more than a little off-putting. i am, however, feeling an end to my SECOND STEP, feeling good about my physical health and feeling as if i am finally helping one of the men i sponsor to move forward with his step work. the low impact workouts of the past four days, have me ready to run this morning and i am way ahead of my usual schedule.
all things considered, this is the best April, i have had in years. the rest of my life is not filled with death, dying, estates, addicts in active addiction or coming out from under a six decade fog. moving into my day, and i mean really moving as in running for over an hour, i do see that all of those feelings that i felt in the past were not only real, but the warped my perception of the world and allowed me to dive into being a victim, which is a behavior i though i long ago eliminated with extreme prejudice. 😁 just for today, i will take what i feel and make sure that i respond, rather than react. i will take the responsibility to deal with my feelings and allow myself to heal.
∞ DT ∞