Some memes

regular reflection, allows me the time to stay in tune with the internal gauge of my conscience. i am a firm believer in the benefit of doing a daily inventory and as a result, for the most part, i can fall asleep quickly and with little disturbance through the night. the fact that i have developed this habit has led to all sorts of unintended consequences, most of which are ones that i find desirable. as i walk through my day, when i find myself about to dive into a less than stellar behavior, i ask myself, do i really want to admit i am wrong, in the long run. i hate to admit i am wrong or at fault for anything. that abhorrence ,drives me towards a pause before responding and the opportunity to choose a different action and eight times out of ten, i make the correct, as in most spiritual, choice. of course those other two times, most of the time lead to at least a text in the late evening, taking responsibility for what i have done.
moving into the here an now, i have this day set aside for being present for others in my life. i volunteered to take a friend in for procedure that i find particularly heinous and have the opportunity to sit here and right this little exercise, while he gets prodded, probed and pictured. i know that when gets done, he will be mostly out of it and it will be important for me to pay attention to his needs, before i drop him off and i go about my merry way. as i have put hi needs in front of my own, at least temporarily, there is part of me that wants to be resentful at him, for needing a ride and me for offering him the ride, after all … when i get to that place, i have to remember that although i am looking at the universe from its relative center and it may appear to revolve around me, the honest truth is that it does not turn to match my will. i also need to remember, that offered because that is the sort of person i am becoming, i care for my friends and allow myself the opportunity to be of service.
the reality of my day this morning, is it is actually kind of nice to be off my beaten path. yes it might have been nice to get a work out in, before running over to Boulder, but that would have required a sacrifice that i was unwilling to give. the nice part of being retired is that i get to make choices about how to spend my day and in the order i get to perform the tasks that comprise my day. in fact, it is quite nice to be relaxing as i wait and having the time to tune out the world around me, which never seems to happen when i am enjoying a cigar at the cigar store. quite an interesting observation. that does not mean i will change what i do, but i may decide to adhere less slavishly to the routine i have developed, just for today.

∞ DT ∞