Ξ± today, however, i understand that the condition of the world was not really the problem. Ξ©
Posted: Wed, Oct 11, 2006 08:04:28 AM
it was my ideas and attitudes about the world that made it impossible for me to find a comfortable place in it.
and the delicious irony of this particular reading , on this particular day just happens to be that after reading this, and doing my morning meditation, the shit hit the fan. at least that as the way i viewed it, all of a sudden i had to break out of my comfortable morning rut and take care of a distant fire, by actually showing up. the end result was as i was driving i started that fine whine of poor me, i cannot even get a chance to shower and have coffee before facing the physical world. and it only got worse inside my head from there. THEN i remembered what the reading was about and laughed out loud, realizing how stupid that whole train of thought was. i " cleaned my lenses " and remembered what the world really looked like. how many people GET to work from home, in their pajamas, before finishing their first cup of coffee? not many! i suddenly became grateful that i had the means to support myself and could do it from the comfort of my own home, with music blasting and when i wanted to. amazing what happens to this poor addict when he decides to take a realistic look at his life!
so will my view once again get distorted by resentments, self-pity and negativity? probably, i am not very good at seeing the brighter side of life on a continuous basis, you know twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, three hundred sixty-five and a quarter days a year. i can quickly develop an attitude of entitlement, being judgmental and just plain nastiness. the hope is that, when i discover i have once again moved into a blurred sense of reality, that i can find the tools that have been freely given to me, to remove the distortion and see my life and the world for what it really is -- A GIFT!
and the delicious irony of this particular reading , on this particular day just happens to be that after reading this, and doing my morning meditation, the shit hit the fan. at least that as the way i viewed it, all of a sudden i had to break out of my comfortable morning rut and take care of a distant fire, by actually showing up. the end result was as i was driving i started that fine whine of poor me, i cannot even get a chance to shower and have coffee before facing the physical world. and it only got worse inside my head from there. THEN i remembered what the reading was about and laughed out loud, realizing how stupid that whole train of thought was. i " cleaned my lenses " and remembered what the world really looked like. how many people GET to work from home, in their pajamas, before finishing their first cup of coffee? not many! i suddenly became grateful that i had the means to support myself and could do it from the comfort of my own home, with music blasting and when i wanted to. amazing what happens to this poor addict when he decides to take a realistic look at his life!
so will my view once again get distorted by resentments, self-pity and negativity? probably, i am not very good at seeing the brighter side of life on a continuous basis, you know twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, three hundred sixty-five and a quarter days a year. i can quickly develop an attitude of entitlement, being judgmental and just plain nastiness. the hope is that, when i discover i have once again moved into a blurred sense of reality, that i can find the tools that have been freely given to me, to remove the distortion and see my life and the world for what it really is -- A GIFT!
∞ DT ∞