Blog entry for:
Wed, Feb 27, 2008 10:51:41 AM
μ no matter how long i have been clean, i have mixed motives behind almost everything i do. μ
posted: Wed, Feb 27, 2008 10:51:41 AM
however, that is no reason to put my life on hold. i do not have to wait for my motives to become perfectly pure before i can start living my recovery. the excuse i was looking for, a means to act-out and drop the blame elsewhere, after all this reading plainly states that we will never be spiritual giants, so why worry, be happy, and do the best i can.
well, it also speaks to examining my motives, working with my sponsor to deal with what i find, and practice what i need to practice in recovery to get better. so the cop-out i am looking for, is not really there, dang it.
so what does the reading really start me thinking about today. well for one thing the changes being manifest in my life as i stay clean and work a program. i have been finding lately that my motives, while far from pure, are not as suspect as i believe. my HIGHER POWER has awakened in me a passion, that my active addiction had almost destroyed. that passion does not always come out in the most spiritual manner, and yes i have made many amends and if history is any indication i will have to make many more.
so anyho0w, i am feeling a bit under the weather today, and would love to call in sick, i do not have that option, so i will move forward through my day as best as i can and see if i can get some stuff done. after all, i can recover regardless of how physically ill i am.
well, it also speaks to examining my motives, working with my sponsor to deal with what i find, and practice what i need to practice in recovery to get better. so the cop-out i am looking for, is not really there, dang it.
so what does the reading really start me thinking about today. well for one thing the changes being manifest in my life as i stay clean and work a program. i have been finding lately that my motives, while far from pure, are not as suspect as i believe. my HIGHER POWER has awakened in me a passion, that my active addiction had almost destroyed. that passion does not always come out in the most spiritual manner, and yes i have made many amends and if history is any indication i will have to make many more.
so anyho0w, i am feeling a bit under the weather today, and would love to call in sick, i do not have that option, so i will move forward through my day as best as i can and see if i can get some stuff done. after all, i can recover regardless of how physically ill i am.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
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∞ as the program works its way into my life, i begin acting less frequently … 387 words ➥ Friday, February 27, 2009 by: donnot
¬ lie back, gather my thoughts, and consider my plans for the day ¬ 433 words ➥ Saturday, February 27, 2010 by: donnot
° when i stop and examine my actions, reactions and motives ° 771 words ➥ Sunday, February 27, 2011 by: donnot
∨ more than likely i will never become a spiritual giant ∨ 708 words ➥ Monday, February 27, 2012 by: donnot
þ no matter how long i have been clean, þ 320 words ➥ Wednesday, February 27, 2013 by: donnot
♦ when i look at myself realistically, ♦ 682 words ➥ Thursday, February 27, 2014 by: donnot
¿ **PURE** motives ? 550 words ➥ Friday, February 27, 2015 by: donnot
⋙ i AM doing ⋘ 948 words ➥ Saturday, February 27, 2016 by: donnot
➴ i certainly have ➶ 570 words ➥ Monday, February 27, 2017 by: donnot
🍋 i will NOT 🍪 453 words ➥ Tuesday, February 27, 2018 by: donnot
🚏 waiting to develop 🚏 473 words ➥ Wednesday, February 27, 2019 by: donnot
😈 mixed motives 😇 685 words ➥ Thursday, February 27, 2020 by: donnot
🎉 i just may be 🎢 467 words ➥ Saturday, February 27, 2021 by: donnot
😶 a spiritual giant, 😵 519 words ➥ Sunday, February 27, 2022 by: donnot
😀 am i 😕 546 words ➥ Monday, February 27, 2023 by: donnot
🚪 powerlessness 💺 595 words ➥ Tuesday, February 27, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 1
2) All things depend on it for their production, which it gives to
them, not one refusing obedience to it. When its work is accomplished,
it does not claim the name of having done it. It clothes all things
as with a garment, and makes no assumption of being their lord;--it
may be named in the smallest things. All things return (to their root
and disappear), and do not know that it is it which presides over
their doing so;--it may be named in the greatest things.