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when i started this process, i believed that not only did i have all the answers, but that i knew how to live. i had used 'successfully' for 25 years and the measure of this success was that i had no consequences, at least legal ones. i had accepted that i would never be able to have more than 1 or 2 friends, i would only have romantic relationships with 'nut cases' and that i would always use and never succeed financially.
the truth was that i lied to myself to cover the fact that i had been warped by my addiction into a creature that did what it needed to, to survive.
these days, i accept the fact that i have much to learn about how to live and that i cannot do this alone. each new day provides the lessons i need to learn to live better tomorrow and i never know who will be my instructor. i am more open-minded to what others may tell me and i am willing to integrate each lesson into the body of knowledge i have already accumulated.
i am not unique, i only have a day-to-day reprieve from the ravages of active addiction and the only way i can survive, thrive and be happy is to do my best to learn from each and every day that i walk this path.
∞ DT ∞