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if i expect to find solutions to problems that arise in my life. the real question is that really a price i am willing to pay, after all, how i look is sometimes way more important to me than how i feel! as i work with one of the men, whom i sponsor on his SIXTH STEP, i am certainly revisiting mine. each part of the process, he completes makes me think about the next little part, and how it worked for me. my experience is by no means universal, as all i have to offer, is what it was that i did and what happened as a result. ironically i have had two sponsees go out and use during this process, and one go way off the deep end, literally, so my experience has been the STEP SIX is not for the faint of heart or those who may be vacillating in the commitment to recovery.
however, that is a huge digression, yes STEP SIX is about finding humility, but the reading was all about matching my outsides to my insides and when i happen to have fuckered-up insides, ask for help, a solution or something other that a diversion from what i am feeling. i am a very poor example when it comes to asking for help. i want to believe that if i just grin and bare whatever i will get the solution from on high or something. yes, i seem to forget that i have friends and peers, who not only have walked through what i am walking through, but came through it clean and stronger for the experience.
i wish i could write more today, but i lack the focus to do so. it is a great day to be clean and i will certainly do my best to keep it that way.

∞ DT ∞