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once i took the first drug? an interesting question for someone like me, especially when i am out on vacation with the other 85%. they know parts of my history, but i have a cell phone, a rental car and cash in my bank account so in reality, i could “disappear” for a few and <BOOM> my vacation becomes something a bit more serious.
so what is the nature of my program today, after all the urge, the desire, my NEED to use has been lifted and been lifted for quite some time? do i really need to be vigilant, checking my motives, the situations i find myself in and walking on eggshells around legal substances? may not like it was back in the day, but certainly cast a wary eye on my motives when i catch myself theorizing how that micro-brew might taste. and after all, i do live in a state where “dis an dat” can be had, legally and without consequence, that is after i take the test i need to take to make the conversion to a full-time equivalent job.
so not a whole to see here, i guess i will move long and remember that even if the rest of the group is having a refreshing malt beverage, i am not immune to the consequences that first one will wreak upon the life i have quite carefully constructed, as a result of a number of days clean.

∞ DT ∞