I have been clean for:
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๐ŸŸŠ feeling good ๐ŸŸŠ

Posted: Fri, Mar 8, 2019 07:32:41 AM

about myself is generally not the first thing i think about when i start my day. lately it has not even been something i even considered as i struggle under the consequences of my self-will. this morning, the reading and my service over the past two nights has brought a bit of light into my bleak inner landscape. i GET to go to work and perhaps get to explore a new opportunity. i GET to be clean and live an active program of recovery. this morning, i GET to write this and although there are a few rainbows in here for a change, it is not about letting the rest of the world see me how i want to be seen, which lately has been a cynical and bitter curmudgeon.
part of this renewal is that yesterday due to circumstances beyond my control, i had to start a project to write a new weather widget for my web site. i have a few ideas to “enhance” it, which i will be implementing over the next few days. i forgot how it feels to be creative and all the effort i have been putting into my physical fitness has upset the balance a bit. after all, if i am getting 11,000 steps per day, i “owe” myself some game and TV time. before i forget:

Derek R,
Fifteen (15) years clean!
No matter how hard you try to deny it,
you are still one of us. Keep Coming Back.

back to where i was. over the next few days, that little widget that most everyone probably ignores in the bottom left hand of my web page, will change and become better suited to who i am. all i have done is added the numbers, the next part is truly making it a reflection of who i am and upgrade what it says and how it looks.
when i uncovered why the old version was not working yesterday, i was ticked off. the company that was providing the access to that information decided it would no longer do so and had cut off my supply. i knew this day was coming, as what was once a tiny little friendly company had been swallowed by media and technical giants, so what was once upon a time, a boost to get their name out there, is no longer required, after all now they have deep pockets and all the resources they need. i GET to do something more and perhaps his will be what drives me to polish up my skills and move forward with my education.
anyhow, i do have a job to get to and stuff to get done for my employer. it is time to move along and take what i feel about myself this morning out into the real world.

∞ DT ∞


Another Look

This day in older entries

๐Ÿ˜ซ pain is pain, ๐Ÿ˜ซ
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๐Ÿ’™ i really ๐Ÿ’™
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๐Ÿ”‚ responsibility, ๐Ÿ”€
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๐Ÿฅฐ self - esteem, ๐Ÿฅฐ
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๐Ÿค” trendy psychological cures ๐Ÿคท
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๐Ÿ’– loving myself ๐Ÿ’–
406 words ➥ Sunday, March 8, 2020 by donnot
๐Ÿƒ i really am ๐Ÿ‚
423 words ➥ Thursday, March 8, 2018 by donnot
๐ŸŒด fix-it-yourself ๐ŸŒถ
628 words ➥ Wednesday, March 8, 2017 by donnot
โ†ณ learning to โ†ฒ
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โ€” a day i looked forward to eagerly โ€”
714 words ➥ Sunday, March 8, 2015 by donnot
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437 words ➥ Saturday, March 8, 2014 by donnot
โŠฅ to show love for myself, whether i **feel** โŠฅ
681 words ➥ Friday, March 8, 2013 by donnot
โ™ฅ i will do something today that โ™ฅ
531 words ➥ Thursday, March 8, 2012 by donnot
ยฅ what i want most is to feel good about myself ยฅ
627 words ➥ Tuesday, March 8, 2011 by donnot
ฮฑ learning to love ฮฑ
387 words ➥ Wednesday, March 8, 2006 by donnot
โ†” learning to love myself โ†”
292 words ➥ Tuesday, March 8, 2005 by donnot

Tao Te Ching

☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯

The Tao Teh King, or The Tao and Its Characteristics
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge

Book 1

2) Therefore a wise prince, marching the whole day, does not go far
from his baggage waggons. Although he may have brilliant prospects
to look at, he quietly remains (in his proper place), indifferent
to them. How should the lord of a myriad chariots carry himself lightly
before the kingdom? If he do act lightly, he has lost his root (of
gravity); if he proceed to active movement, he will lose his throne.