Blog entry for:

to the message of the fellowship that has given me a this new manner of living. WHEW following a tradition or two by changing the headline of my source material, made that first bit, more than a bit wordy. i have to say, before i get down to this quickie this morning that the message i carry is HOPE and the promise is FREEDOM. my source material took quite a different tack on that topic and ironically it reminded me of a time when i was about five years or so clean when a peer asked me how to enroll in the “Acme School of Sponsorship,” because i always seemed to have the perfectly spiritual and correct answer to the questions she posed. what i had learned to do by then, is to channel the voices of my predecessors and my peers and focus on the issue at hand. i knew all about being a social and karma chameleon, so applying that survival skill to recovery, gave me the ability to sound a whole lot wiser and stable than i really was.
today, i know that i hardly know anything at all. i am open to seeing the world through the eyes of others, but i still carry a message that if someone such as myself could get clean, stay clean and learn to live a life worth living, any one certainly could. i believe that the ability to stay clean and live an active program, of recovery is inherent in everyone that walks into the rooms. can recover and will recover, however, are two entirely different actions. more than once i have seen a peer or three fade away as their lives became better than they ever imagined. i used to be all sorts of judgemental about that, especially if it was someone i cared for and helped out. as i come into my own identity i see that is short-sighted and far from relevant. what they do with what they find here, is up to them. for me, i am grateful i have a way of living that minimizes my wake on the world around me, as i choose to live by a spiritual principle or two, just for today. so it is off to Montana and out of the daily grind for a few days. i am looking forward to some family time and a bit of down time.

∞ DT ∞