Blog entry for:

upon such a foundation, I can build for a lifetime in recovery.
before i get rolling, a happy Thanksgiving to one and all, i am certainly grateful for what i have this morning.it goes without saying, but i will say it anyhow, that all i have today, is the result of the program of recovery i embarked upon all those days ago. yes, i am far from perfect, i lapse in spiritual principles, and at meetings the past few days, i have not been present for what is going on. gaming on my cell phone, cutting up with the addict sitting nest to me, and just plain spacing are the sins i have been guilty of, and although it does affect my recovery, what i came up in my TENTH STEP last night, is what sort of message am i really carrying with that behavior? certainly not the one i wish to impart, namely that being physically present at a meeting is enough to stay clean. it is true, that i have never used at a meeting. it is also true, that from time to time, i find meetings to be a drag. all that being said, am i chipping away at my foundation, by ignoring what the real point is for meeting attendance? that point, is: it is at meetings that i GET the message from the POWER that fuels my recovery and i am ignoring that message at my peril.
coming back to the here and now, i know what is going on. as i prepare myself for the change that is manifest in STEP SEVEN, i am acting on my defects of character, thinking that maybe i have enough knowledge and clean-time to stray away from the activities, rituals and daily habits that got me to this place in my life. the reading reminds me, that it is NOT recovery i have to fit into my life, i HAVE to fit my life into my recovery. as clich⁄and as trite as that sounds, it is time for me to remember once again what i am and how i got here. it is the POWER that fuels my recovery, that allows me to live free from active addiction, it is self-will that spins me back to the tipping point. returning to those simple things that kept me clean way back when and most importantly, finding a way to keeps them fresh as i walk through today, is what i heard from the reading this morning. i am who i am BECAUSE i did all of that when i was first getting clean and i can only become the man i want to be, by continuing to strengthen my foundation.
so it is time to run to the store and get cooking for my contribution to the celebrations this afternoon. although it is a full day, i NEED to remember that without recovery, i would not be able to participate in the life i have been given and being grateful for that life is not something i can do just once a year, it is an attitude i need to walk though every single day i draw my next breath.
off to the showers and out to the grocery store to see what i can find.

∞ DT ∞